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Anonymous
| | Posted on Friday, September 08, 2006 - 10:36 pm: | |
My youngest daughter is 2 1/2 yrs old. She trained herself to use the potty before her 2nd birthday. After about a month or so of success, she started having accidents. I thought maybe she was too young and put her back in a pull-up. But then a few months later, she trained herself AGAIN! So that worked for about a month and then accidents started up again. But I felt that at this time, she was ready. She was27 months old. I kept at it and refused the pull-up except at night. Since that time, she has continued to have almost every day or so. Just peeing, not bowel movements. yes, I have used rewards, punishments, ignored it all, etc. I even called her pediatrician to rule out physical problems. Finally, today, after her nap (no pull-up), I told her to use the potty before her snack. She laid on the floor whining and refusing. I told her, "no potty, no snack. If you want a snack, first use the potty." She refused. I walked away for a few minutes, when I returned, she had an accident on the floor. I realize now it is a control issue with her. How do I handle this? Do I just forget it all and put her in a pull-up? (I dread this!) Please help! |
Narmin Parpia
| | Posted on Tuesday, September 12, 2006 - 02:07 pm: | |
To: Mom of self-trained 2 1/2 year old
Sounds like you've tried just about everything. I'm glad to hear you've checked with the pediatrician too. I want to encourage you to continue doing what you are doing. Don't give in, and don't get discouraged! Unfortunately when we potty train our children it usually coincides with their strong wills beginning to mature (the terrible twos, or threes in many cases).
The snack time "accident" you described wasn't an accident at all. Escalate the consequences and be sure you identify her currency. Just what makes her tick? What is her absolute favorite toy or activity? That's her currency, that's what will matter to her.
Another thing to consider is the readiness signal of emotional and social awareness. Your daughter may have achieved physiological development, motor skills, and cognitive and verbal development, but may not be quite ready emotionally or socially. She may be caught in an undesireable phase of self mastery. One option is to back off and try again later. Avoiding that, you may want to watch for signs and times when your daughter desires to be like other kids and discuss the potty training with her from that perspective. For example "Look, Sally doesn't wear diapers anymore. Do you want to be like Sally?" It's risky, but some parents have luck letting their child know "it's O.K. with me if it's O.K. with you". In other words, play on their emotion of wanting to be a big kid and wanting to be like others. Let her know if she doesn't cooperate you will have no other choice then to put her back in diapers like a baby. Maybe if she realizes it's not a big deal to you (reverse psychology), and that she will be the one who will be embarrased, she might change her mind.
Thank you for sharing your story. Best of luck to you! We look forward to hearing how you and your daughter fair moving forward.
Narmin |
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